Fuck, I would NEVER not know when I need a dildo! LOL, you caught me out there! Wanted to make sure all of you guys are reading my posts! Hit like if you all are, I wanna make sure you are paying attention... You never know what might happen 😋
2023-08-22 23:59:01 +0000 UTC
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Walked with so much energy into my room! I need this right now, but what the fuck was it? My dildo? 😏 Did I need to take something out? It's fucking gone into the random memories black hole and I will never know what happened! 😲
2023-08-22 20:01:27 +0000 UTC
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Guuuuyyysss, I fucking ALWAYS feel like whenever I go into a room I forget what I need. It's like the door way is a magical place that clears my memory... Is it just me? I feel so lost! LOL!
2023-08-22 18:05:19 +0000 UTC
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G'morning!! Embrace the day with open arms and avoid knocking anything over! 😂
2023-08-22 15:00:43 +0000 UTC
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I grab some bamboo sticks like a makeshift shield. It's like I'm a hero in a funny story, gearing up to block the super sneezes coming from the panda. With my bamboo protection and a whole lot of determination, I'm ready to face off against the sneeziest challenge of my life! After a fierce exchange of achoos, it's like we suddenly get each other. We call a sneezing ceasefire... LOL! And that was it!
2023-08-22 03:04:01 +0000 UTC
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Then BAM! I am hit with its sneezing frenzy! And I was tryna dodge sneezes from all angels! A sneeze ninja in the making. Trying to duck and avoid all this sudden air coming at me!
2023-08-22 00:59:02 +0000 UTC
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Out of fucking NOWHERE a panda appears, right. Not too random for Dreamland and it couldn't be that harmless. Pandas are fucking cute and cuddly!
2023-08-21 22:59:01 +0000 UTC
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Are you guys ready for the awesome story of how I managed to outsmart a mission involving a sneezing panda? Haha, trust me, it's an incredibly exciting ride full of twists and turns that you all will fucking love!
2023-08-21 21:01:07 +0000 UTC
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I had the WILDEST dreams last night after that sneezing adventure I didn't mean to take, LOL! The tale of the sneezing panda! 😂
2023-08-21 18:05:47 +0000 UTC
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Rise and rise! LOL, do you want a little help with your getting a hard start to your day, DM me! 😏
2023-08-21 15:02:57 +0000 UTC
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LOL! What are your tips to stop sneezing fits, so I know in case it ever happens again? Hop into my DMs and lmk so I can be prepared for the next tropical fruit storm I create! 😋
2023-08-21 06:01:01 +0000 UTC
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My kitchen ended up coated in a smoothie and looked like Hurricane Bambi had the WILDEST adventure, turning everything fucking upside down with a simple sneezing fit! LOL!
2023-08-21 04:02:01 +0000 UTC
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When it finally stopped I was quite taken aback, fuck, why did that happen? Was it a test to control my clumsiness because it didn't fucking work! LOL
2023-08-21 03:04:01 +0000 UTC
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I tried everything, I looked into the light but as I did that it felt like the sneezes got worst! WTF, my eyes were now watering and I could feel I was losing control! 😛 More so than usual
2023-08-20 23:59:01 +0000 UTC
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Trying to keep cool and not fall off my own chair but it just wouldn't stop! I nearly had my delicious smoothie fly across the room. Would have ended up coating the wall in a new shade of purple!! 😅
2023-08-20 20:01:02 +0000 UTC
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Omg, guuuysss! Just had the most INTENSE sneezing fit! Fuck, it just couldn't control it. Sipping on a smoothie and out of nowhere it began!!!
2023-08-20 18:05:01 +0000 UTC
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Woke feeling like waffles this morning, not literally - I think if I had to get covered in syrup so early I wouldn't enjoy it! LOL! Good morning 😋
2023-08-20 15:02:02 +0000 UTC
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As I snuggle into bed, I reflect on the day's chuckles and chaos. Life's a laugh-filled journey, and I'm buckled up for every twist and turn!
2023-08-20 06:03:02 +0000 UTC
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And as usual, my cooking attempt became a science experiment with explosions of sauce all over the place. Life is a comedy show but it's so much better to laugh at it! 😅
2023-08-20 05:01:01 +0000 UTC
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My furry friend's antics could fill a comedy show. From chasing invisible things, chasing the wind, chasing their tail, and to cozying up in the oddest spots, their daily routine is pure entertainment 😍
2023-08-20 03:04:01 +0000 UTC
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Turned myself on so much in my live that I'm now ready to squirt! WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN?!
2023-08-20 02:15:39 +0000 UTC
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LET’S GO, BOYS!!! IT’S TIME FOR A LIVE SHOW!!
IF YOU MISS OUT, I’M SORRY!! I AM JUST REALLY HORNY RIGHT NOW… 🤤
2023-08-20 01:15:08 +0000 UTC
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AGAIN the remote must have joined my socks in that parallel dimension! I really wonder what it's like there. Odd socks, remotes, missing earphones... LOL, the list is endless. The remote always turns up though, it's like it gets bored of playing hide and seek with me!
2023-08-20 00:59:02 +0000 UTC
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If I go live tonight… will you come? Will you tip? SAY YES!!!
2023-08-20 00:04:21 +0000 UTC
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And as usual, I can only find one sock... My socks have embarked on their quest for freedom, but I've decided they're just leading exciting lives in other dimensions. 😅
2023-08-19 19:01:02 +0000 UTC
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Breakfast calls, and I answer with a cereal box that's so light, it's practically floating. It's a weightless breakfast in zero gravity! WHOOPS!!
2023-08-19 18:02:02 +0000 UTC
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Wake up, world, it's showtime! Life's throwing curveballs, and I'm in the front row with my popcorn!!! A curve ball isn't always a bad thing!!
2023-08-19 15:02:01 +0000 UTC
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I hope y’all enjoyed my sexy marge Simpson cosplay today 😆
2023-08-19 06:37:56 +0000 UTC
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Well, I had the BEST fucking day EVER in my fort of fucking awesome! Sadly, every fort must come down eventually. But don't worry, I'll be back in action, planning my next snuggle-fest soon! 🤩
2023-08-19 06:02:02 +0000 UTC
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I totally invited over a few friends for this and the looks they all fucking gave me when they walked into my living room! LOL, I should've had my camera out! 😅
2023-08-19 03:04:02 +0000 UTC
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